More Please

I got a pickle I got a pickle I got a pickle hey hey hey hey

dilly crisp a little bit sweet deliciously pickley homemade with love 
by my mother in law and now gone sadly

Easter In Pictures

I am sad that I didn't think to take a family portrait on Easter Sunday.

We usually do every year.

Is it lame that I can't bring myself to take one with one of our kids missing?

I couldn't help myself either, 

I had to set out Tanner's Easter basket

 even though I sent his Easter gifts in a package last week.

Phillip laughed pretty hard at me and my issues.

What can I say?  I have no defense.

I just feel his absence in everything.

Emily had youth conference and was absent too this weekend.

We missed having her around.

We remember, all too well, what the next year will be like for her and us 

after experiencing it once with Tanner already.

I can not believe that she will be a Senior!

It was extra strange having just 2 kids at home.

I am not well prepared for all these changes.

My family is shrinking

and I do not care for it much.  

I look forward to the day when it starts to grow again

with daughter in laws and son in laws 

and then...

Grandchildren!

We are blessed and so full of hope for our future.

I love my family

 and our extended family too.  

Here is our day in pictures

Kate loves Her Cousin Miles

Kate loves baby Miles

She can't wait to be a Mommy.

It's All About The Eggs

We had some amazing clouds displayed for us a week or so ago. 

I snapped a couple pictures with my phone thinking

I will maybe send some to Tanner.  

He has always loved crisp white billowy clouds like me.

It was a beautiful day.

It felt like a gift.

My mind keeps coming back to this scripture I read last week.

I don't know why this happens sometimes

other than I must need the lesson that is in it.  

Maybe if I finally give it my full thoughts 

for little while this morning 

I will be able to move forward.

D&C 88:32...they shall return again to their own place, 

to enjoy that which they are willing to receive,

because they were not willing to enjoy 

that which they might have received.

It makes me think of the story Phillip shared with me from the priesthood session of general conference.  It's the story of a man that saved and saved and finally was able to buy tickets for a cruise.  He barely had the money to go so he packed all his own food so as to keep from having to spend any more.  If I heard the story right, this man, while on the cruise, watched all the other people partake of these wildly elaborate buffets and shows as he sat on the deck eating his spam and crackers.  Then, on the last night of the cruise, everyone was all dressed up and going to dinner and someone asked him if he was going to be there.  He told them that he didn't have the money for that.  The gentleman then told him that all the meals and shows  were included with the ticket for the cruise!

  

Can you imagine how this man must have felt?  

All that was available to him, all week long, 

and he didn't even know it.  

What a bummer.  

I think Phillip said this speaker, then, talked about how we must be careful or we can become like this man.  

Living below our privileges. 

Sometimes I think I am guilty of this. 

I forget all that I have available to me.

I wonder...

what, exactly, might I have enjoyed

had I been more willing to believe I could receive it? 

Why is it so much easier to see how my kids do this to themselves?

What does willing really mean anyway? 

Adj. Ready, eager, or prepared to do something. 

I want to be more ready, eager and prepared 

to enjoy that which I might receive.

I certainly don't want my children to be like the 

second half of that verse...

Someone who is not willing to enjoy 

that which they might have received.

Their possibilities our endless.  

I have so much hope for my children 

to become all they are meant AND able to become.

If they do not think it possible...

they will return again to their own place 

to only enjoy that which they are willing to receive.

That makes me feel like someone let all the air out of my balloon.

D&C 88:33 For what doth it profit a man 

if a gift is bestowed upon him, 

and he receive not the gift? 

Behold, he rejoices not in that which is given unto him, 

neither rejoices in him who is the giver of the gift.

Whats For Dinner?

I am stuck in a rut and need help escaping.

What are you making for Easter Dinner?

If I had it my way we would skip dinner and go straight to dessert.

I don't remember where I saw this picture but I love it.  

 kudos to who ever took it.

We're Chairless

Chairless and Challenged

Yes, that is a good description of me right now

I am trying to be brave

break out of the norm

be a little daring

oh please

who am I kidding

I am as plain as they come

but do my chairs have to be?

Dare me

Please

Goodbye dirty fingerprints

Goodbye ugly chipped corners

Goodbye 9 year old nail holes 

(that I really meant to fill eventually)

Goodbye horrible trim job

Goodbye my adored beigeish muted green

(It's not that I didn't love you)

HHHeeelllooo Silver Sage

(How do you spell that whistle sound you make 

when you see something sexy?)

   

A Hot Summer Day Treat

(or something cold for all those sore throats out there.)

 

Strawberry Limeade Slush

fill the blender with frozen strawberries

Fill a 12 oz cup with water 

and add 2/3 cup sugar

1/3 cup lime juice

mix well 

pour water over strawberries

and blend

if needed just add a little more water

It tastes great with less sugar too 

and if you don't want to use sugar at all

you could always try honey instead.

Enjoy!

 

Prom number one for Emily

 

Emily went to a neighboring school's prom with some of her favorite people this last Saturday night. 

She has her prom at her high school with a date in 2 weeks. 

She thought it would be fun to wear one of my old formals from the 80's,

minus the giant poofy sleeves.

Were grateful for help from Terri Moore to help us make that happen.

I think I found a home for the subway art Phillip made for me.

Now, what to put in that big empty cabinet...

My brother

Another phone picture in the dark.

 I've decided that iphones need flashes.

My brother is having surgery today...

in Washington.  

I'm thinking about him a lot this morning.  

We had a good visit over the phone just before he got to the hospital. 

Lets just say he was in great spirits

(already medicated hahaha) 

I guess it's our family's year for surgeries.  

Thank goodness its for things that just need a one time fixing.  

I expect the surgery to go well and for him to be home, in his own bed, by tomorrow night.  

Visiting with him makes me thankful for a brother.  

I may have been his favorite person to torture when we were growing up 

but I also remember just being his favorite person... 

every now and then, 

when we were little. 

We only lived together until I was 7.  

That was how old I was when my parents divorced. 

 It's funny how even though we didn't always grow up in the same house, we are a lot alike.  

Well, aside form the fact that I am smarter than he is. Hehehe. 

He is my older brother,

 but only by 19 months.  

I often felt the need to be better than him at things.

  It mostly left me frustrated. 

Perhaps that is a sign who the real smarty pants is.  

I love you Jeffrey

Dreams Of A 10 Year Old Girl

It was kind of dark in my room but I couldn't pass up this moment.  

 I had to snap a few pictures with my phone.

It begs to ask...

What could you do with

one wedding dress

a roll of toilet paper

and the dreams of a 10 year old girl?

Chaddy

It is difficult to get a picture of my Chad.  

He is not fond of the camera.  

We went to disneyland last week while the kids were on spring break and I caught him in a unexpecting moment.  

He is a sweet boy.  13 is tough.  I remember.  He is handling it quite well though.  It has been more difficult for him to deal will his brother being gone.  

The other night, we had just arrived home from a baby blessing for our nephew in Huntington Beach and, Chad was asking me if I had to get my lesson prepared for seminary.  I told him that I had an inservice meeting the next morning and did not have to prepare a lesson.  

He shouted, 

"Hooray.... I call the seat next to mom on the couch!"

My heart melted a little bit.  

13 is big.  It's teenager status.  I am happy to say though, that it isn't too old to still want to curl up next to your mom while you watch TV.  I know there wont be too many more moments like this. 

I can hope though.

Motivation

Just thinking about that word a lot lately.

It is true that, as a mom, my main motivation is love... 

in my best moments

and even in some of my bad ones.

I know the love is still there in abundance

however

the motivation is lacking.

It's like my tank of motivation is empty and 

I need to do something or go somewhere to fill it up.

The problem is

I just don't know where one fills that particular kind of tank up.

It is the tank that motivates me to do laundry, dishes, fix meals, clean up mud rooms, get the dust off the base boards, organize the office or go through the two foot tall stack of mail and misc papers littering my desk.

 

It is the tank that motivates me to help resolve disagreements, explain something complicated, or, 

heaven forbid, 

repeat myself.

  

It's also the tank that motivates me to 

tolerate the moans and groans I receive after asking children to pick up after them selves, 

brush their teeth, do chores or tell them what is for dinner.

I think it is an important tank.

I'd pay big money for this kind of high octane gas.

Sometimes I think this gas is hidden in chocolate somewhere.
But it isn't.

That is where I found a double chin though... 

just in case you were looking for one.

It Is Gone

I just thought I would report on the bacon bar. 

It... 

well...

It is gone. 

All of it 

every last satisfyingly salty 

yet delightfully sweet bit.

It was delicious

maybe a little bit evil

addictingly marvelous

It was

Down. Right. Naughty.